[story] atcv2 #5.1

As the subject sugest this isn't a full installment. In fact it's just a
rather small(ish) paragraph, but I felt like posting it right away
nevertheless. Just consider it part of number five...

*****

The light of the fire stood like a beacon against the darkness of the
forest, and like a beacon it drew attention to it; the attendants were
already gathering.
On first looks there was nothing unusual about them; they looked
pretty much like one foot high deer. Admittedly there were a bit
on the short side, but that didn't make them unusual, or at
least not much. On second looks however... On second looks the
tail moved just a bit too much like a snake, the body was just a
bit too lean, the legs ended in just a bit too many spidery
digits, four instead of each hoof, and the head looked just a
lot more like something out of a nightmare than it ought to,
sporting pupil-less black eyes, large ears each as big as the
rest of the head and instead of the snout a trunk with two
concentric rings of small, razor-sharp teeth along its opening.
Nothing unusual at all.
The creatures kept well out sight, but they were watching.
Anticipating. And with the anticipation came excitement and
pushing and shoving and bickering. One of the creatures
staggered out of the flock to try and keep its balance, only to
hit that oddly shaped rock to the right. The rock was warm, soft
and growled. In an instant the small creatures speed stove
away, leaving the dark gray wolf to watch the scene in solitude,
a shadow amidst the shadows.
--
emmel <the_emmel*you-know-what-that's-for*@gmx.net>
(Don't forget to remove the ** bit)

Official AGC feedback maniac

"God is playing creatures - and we're the norns."

"A hundred dead are a tragedy - a hundred thousand are statistics."

"I guess you can call yourself lucky." -
"I could, but Linda suits me a little better...
Things called lucky tend to get hit by trucks."

Proud owner of 1 (one) DISOBEDIENCE point.
Former owner of 1 (one) eating point (eaten, sigh).

Hi, I'm a .sig virus. Just copy me to your .signature. And don't worry.

emmel schreef:
> As the subject sugest this isn't a full installment. In fact it's just a
> rather small(ish) paragraph, but I felt like posting it right away
> nevertheless. Just consider it part of number five...
>
> *****
>
> The light of the fire stood like a beacon against the darkness of the
> forest, and like a beacon it drew attention to it; the attendants were
> already gathering.
> On first looks there was nothing unusual about them; they looked
> pretty much like one foot high deer. Admittedly there were a bit
> on the short side, but that didn't make them unusual, or at
> least not much. On second looks however... On second looks the

On a second look however (bis)

First look, second look, third look.

> tail moved just a bit too much like a snake, the body was just a
> bit too lean, the legs ended in just a bit too many spidery

just a little too many

> digits, four instead of each hoof, and the head looked just a

four on each hoof
just looked a lot more then ... ought to look

> lot more like something out of a nightmare than it ought to,
> sporting pupil-less black eyes, large ears each as big as the
> rest of the head and instead of the snout a trunk with two
> concentric rings of small, razor-sharp teeth along its opening.
> Nothing unusual at all.
> The creatures kept well out sight, but they were watching.
> Anticipating. And with the anticipation came excitement and
> pushing and shoving and bickering. One of the creatures
> staggered out of the flock to try and keep its balance, only to
> hit that oddly shaped rock to the right. The rock was warm, soft
> and growled. In an instant the small creatures speed stove
> away, leaving the dark gray wolf to watch the scene in solitude,
> a shadow amidst the shadows.

As much as I hate to tell you I think you need to redo some bits here
and there It was very hard to follow for me.

Thomas
--
A society with suicide bombers
is a polite society